The knot in the pit of my stomach grows.
And grows.
And grows.
The tears flood my eyes and again, I push them back.
I am falling back into fear.
Fear that you don't feel the same way.
Fear that I'll be along again.
Fear that I'm going to fail.
I want you so bad, I can taste it, feel it, see it.
It seems to be just outside my grasp, but as I move toward it, it moves away.
I have to bite my lips till I bleed to keep my self from screaming
"I love you"
Am I supposed to? Is it real?
Do I care?
I want to yell from the rooftops, to write our initials with little hearts on every tree and piece of paper and in the snow.
But I'm scared. So I keep this secret deep inside.
Hoping that you say it first.
And when,
if,
you do,
I will too.
